Parenting is one of the toughest jobs on the planet. You need to find a way to help your kids grow into healthy and happy adults without being influenced by the negative effects of toxic relationships.
But this can be difficult when you are surrounded by people who have different opinions about how to do it right.
Collaborative Problem Solving for Kids with Explosive Behaviors
Whether your child has a learning disability, is from an LGBTQ family or is dealing with other issues, it’s important to be aware of how these unique circumstances can change traditional parenting styles. High-quality parenting books should help you rethink your approach and give you new information to support developmentally appropriate expectations for your children.
Oppositional, defiant and explosive behavior are a major challenge for kids and caregivers. Behaviorally challenging kids lack critical cognitive skills such as flexibility or adaptability, frustration tolerance and problem solving. Instead of imposing their will, these kids need to learn how to think for themselves and solve problems collaboratively. This is what CPS (Collaborative & Proactive Solutions) is all about. Developed by Ross Greene, author of The Explosive Child, this is an evidence-based model for psychosocial treatment that avoids power and control tactics and focuses on teaching kids essential thinking skills. This approach can be applied to any kid, at any age.
Raising Good Humans
Raising good human beings is a big job and this book offers a framework for how to approach parenting from a compassionate perspective. It starts by teaching parents to understand and control their own emotions and then it explains how to connect with children in a respectful and loving way.
This book is a must-have for parents who want to avoid yelling and punishing their kids. Instead, it teaches parents to use a gentle approach that focuses on problem-solving and encouraging language. It also explains the importance of acknowledging children’s feelings and helps them work through conflict.
In this podcast episode, Dr. Pressman talks with sleep expert Jason Bronstein about how to train your toddler (and yourself) to fall asleep on time and stay sleeping through the night! It’s a must-listen for anyone who struggles with a sleep schedule. Then, they also tackle common questions from listeners and offer helpful tips on handling toddler behaviors like biting & bath-time blues.
Raising Strong Siblings
It’s one thing to fend off the occasional sibling battle over a toy, but it’s even better to raise kids who genuinely like and respect each other. That’s a harder challenge, but one that’s incredibly important because it yields adults who can work as a team with almost anyone.
Encourage siblings to find common interests and develop shared hobbies. You can also help them learn to resolve their own conflicts by giving them plenty of opportunities to practice turn-taking and see things from a different perspective. When a child is playing well with their sibling, don’t interrupt them unless it’s absolutely necessary.
Remind them that friends will come and go, but family is forever. When a child is sick or hurt, make it a practice for siblings to step in and nurture one another. For example, have them send each other for ice packs or bandaids. Let them play doctor or nurse and feel like they’re helping each other when they really are.
While parents often blame themselves when a child makes a bad choice or doesn’t follow their advice, it is important to acknowledge that not all parenting decisions work out. Rather than beat yourself up over a daughter’s D+ on the math test or your own harsh words to your teenager, focus on learning from your mistakes and trying again.
Parenting compassionately is far more fulfilling for both parents and children than resentfully slogging through every parental challenge like a labor of drudgery. It is not easy, but it is worth it!
If you want to learn how to parent more effectively and feel closer to your kids and spouse/partner, then download this free Modern Parenting workbook! It includes tips and tools for discovering your personal passions, values, and beliefs (PVBs) and using them to guide your parenting choices. It also includes a worksheet to help you create a parenting plan that works best for your family.